Crotch Rockets

I was walking home today, and some guy sped by on a crotch rocket going quite fast. It was SOOOOOO loud that it actually hurt my ears. Is there really a need to drive your motorcycle in such a way as to inflict physical pain on others? Jackass.

I could go on, but I feel the obnoxiousness of the crotch rocket is so obvious that it needs no further explanation.

Automatic Toilets/Faucets/Hand Dryers

I hate automatic things in the bathroom. They seem to always do the exact opposite of what you want them to. The toilet, for instance, likes to flush while I am sitting on it. And yet, when I stand up and actually want it to flush, it does not. How disgusting for the toilet to flush while you are on it, as you inevitability get splashed with some toilet water that is composed of part water and part GOD KNOWS what else. EW. And how disgusting to leave a toilet unflushed. See? Automatic toilet is crap (pun intended). Give us the manual flusher back and we'll continue to flush it with our foot and everyone's happy.

Same with the automatic faucet. You sit there and wave your hand under it. Nothing happens. You keep waving. Nothing. And there is no alternative method of initiating water flow. So you sit there and keep waving like an idiot and hope that you can engage in sanitary hygiene practices like washing your hands after using a stupid toilet that flushed on you.

If you are lucky enough to be able to wash your hands, then you are faced with the automatic dryer, or the new-fangled automatic paper towel dispenser. You wave and wave and no hot air starts blowing or no paper towel comes out. And now you're waving with wet hands, which start dripping all down your arms and soaking your sleeves. Often you give up and just wipe your hands on your pants. Now those are wet, too.

So let's recap: You just wanted to use the facilities. Now you've had nasty toilet water spewed on you, you may not have been able to wash your hands, and your sleeves and/or pants are all wet. All of this courtesy of a technology that is supposed to enable us to not have to touch anything in the bathroom. Hmmm...

P.S. These automatic annoyances are further evidence that machines are evil and intentionally mess with us. See previous post on (Evil) Automated Phone Operators.

Being Lax with the Laundry Room

First of all, I apologize for the long delay in posting. Graduation was super busy, and then I got to unwind in Santa Barbara for a week. But I'm back, with many more things that drive me nuts.

Okay...so I live in an apartment building with one washing machine and one dryer. Though there are only seven units, there is a perpetual battle to get laundry done. In my busy schedule, I often find myself with a very small window of time to clean my clothes, and so when I bag it all up and carry it down to the basement, I'm hoping for the best. When the machine is going, then all's fair, someone got there first, I have to wait. But what is INTOLERABLE is when the machine is off and you're psyched, but when you open the washer or dryer, someone's clothes are just sitting there.

Now, I'm not saying anyone should have to sit down there and transfer their clothes the moment the machine stops. There is a grace period. But if you leave your crap down there for more than 20 minutes, you're a real pain in the butt. I'll leave and wait 15 minutes and come back. Stuff still there. Leave and come back, leave and come back...stuff still there. Where did the person go?? And are they EVER coming back? Do they think they are the only person who needs to clean their clothes? They're all, "I'll just throw my clothes in here and then go on vacation for a week." Jerks.

I think it's fair game to take someone's stuff out of the wash and stick it in the dryer if they don't show after 20 minutes. But then you know they'll show up at the last minute and start the dryer the second you're ready for it. So you have to wait AGAIN. If they don't show up, then you have to haul their crap back into the washer. It sucks.

And all the while, it's just awkward. I don't exactly like touching other people's clothes. And I'm sure they don't like me touching their clothes. I also live in fear of the moment that ensues when they show up in the middle of me moving their crap. AWKWARD. You're all, "hi...here's your underwear." Taking stuff out of the dryer is even trickier. It's okay to leave wet clothes in a pile in the dryer...but I don't want to leave someone's dry, clean clothes in a heap. So am I supposed to fold their stuff? It seems polite...but it takes forever and makes it even more likely that they will walk in while I'm handling their delicates. And why should they get nicely folded laundry? That's rewarding inconsiderate behavior. It's just a bad situation.

I long for the day when I have my own washer and dryer. When I don't have to wonder what kind of funky stuff someone is sticking in there, when I don't have to clean out a stranger's lint trap, and when I don't have to hoard quarters like they're gold. Alas, for now I must continue to rely on other people's laundry etiquette...and hold my breath while I handle my neighbors' unmentionables.

You Know What Does NOT Drive Me Nuts?

Finishing my last law school final EVER. That does not drive me nuts ONE bit.

No more back-breaking case books. No more insanity-inducing finals. No more super competitive classmates. No more outlining. No more wacky grading system. No more rankings. No more 100-page reading assignments in one night.

Now all I need is a job. Lack of jobs for public interest lawyers DOES drive me nuts. Oh, and passing the bar would be nice...

Insensitive Gawkers Who Lack Compassion

Today I walked out of The Gap (on Powell and Market) and walked right into the mob of people watching the man standing on the ledge about to jump. Once I realized what was going on, I stood there for a minute or two not knowing what to do. I was literally paralyzed at first and felt so ugly inside that I was standing there watching this poor guy. The people around me were laughing and making jokes such as, "He must have just gotten his hotel bill." (Turns out he was on the ledge of a loft apartment, not a hotel.) Other people kept saying he won't jump because if you stand there long enough for the cops to show up, you are just trying to get attention. And the cops did show up...LOTS of them. And firefighters and EMTs. A firefighter even climbed up to the top of the building...

ANYWAY, after about a minute of shock, I snapped out of it and thought, if this guy is having an internal struggle over whether to jump, then it's not something I need or want to see. And if he DOES actually jump, then it's DEFINITELY not something I need or want to see. How would you ever get that image out of your mind?? So I immediately left. A few minutes later he did jump. Tons of people took tons of pictures and I'm sure a video or two will pop up on YouTube (sadly).

I understand that people are fascinated with these things. I mean, I stood there dumbfounded for a minute or two before reason and compassion kicked in...we have some morbid fascination with staring at disasters. And I know that sometimes people make jokes when they are uncomfortable. But standing there with your cell phone open so you can take a picture of the jump? Posting these pics in the Internet? Filming it? Why, people...WHY??

I know the guy kind of voided his right to privacy by choosing such a public place to jump...but what are you going to do with the pics you took...show them to your buddies like they're something wicked cool? "Look dude, see the guy about to jump?!!! See him jumping??" Really poor taste, people. Really, really quite poor.