People in Glass Houses Shouldn't Throw Grocery Carts

Mike was just at the grocery store, and a kid around 8 or 9 was throwing some sort of tantrum. He was whining about not getting something he wanted, and to show his discontent, he was jerking the cart around and pushing it in front of his mother to get to her. The mother did nothing...didn't tell him to stop, didn't take the cart away from him...nothing.

A bit later, Mike was bending over to pick something up from the dairy section and a cart suddenly jammed into his calf and Achilles tendon. That's right, you guessed it...in the throes of his continuing tantrum the little punk kid had catapulted the cart right into Mike's leg. Out of instinct, Mike exclaimed "Ow, what the $@&#!" I'd say that's a pretty normal reaction when a cart slams into you unexpectedly.

So what did oblivious mother do? Did she apologize? Did she ask Mike if he was okay? Nope...she scolded Mike for swearing. Um...HUH? I know Mike should not have sworn, but her kid should not have been whipping the cart around, or he would not have rammed it into Mike's leg, thus instigating the swear. If it's anyone's fault, it's HERS. Ironically, the kid actually had a look of remorse on his face before his mom stepped in to yell at Mike. Good thing his mom took away any chance of him learning a lesson from all this...

Bottom line, I'm pretty sure she would have been pissed if Mike scolded her for the way she was handling her son's tantrum. ("How DARE you question my parenting skills??!!!") But somehow she thought she had the right to scold Mike for swearing? People like her have no self-awareness...they don't see their own flaws, yet have no problem telling everyone else what is wrong with them.

All I'm saying is if you don't have your own crap in order, don't go around telling other people what to do. Because it just makes you an asshole. And a really bad role model for your kid.

Gas Pump Hogs

This past weekend, my friend and I were driving back from LA to SF. My friend had to be back to SFO for a flight, and though we were making excellent time, we didn't have much time to spare. We inevitably had to stop for some gas, and pulled into an Arco.

Despite the fact that there were 3 gas pumps in a row, this girl decided to park her car at the first pump, even though she could have pulled up. Then she went inside the station to do who knows what. Buy some stuff, use the restroom. It was ages before she came back and even BEGAN pumping. There was not enough room to drive around her and go to one of the two empty pumps ahead of her. So we were stuck, sitting there, waiting for this selfish hog to do her thing before she decided she felt like pumping her gas.

People...ALWAYS PULL UP!!! You don't just take the first pump and stop. That is absurd. You pull as far forward as you can, to the last pump possible, so you aren't taking up ALL 3 pumps, when you only need ONE. You also pump your gas, and move the hell out of the way. You don't just leave your car there while you run your errands. Repark your car out of the way and THEN use the bathroom and buy your Diet Pepsi and your nachos. It's that simple.

I thought this was well-known gas pumping etiquette. ESPECIALLY when you are at a gas station off of a major highway, where many, MANY people will be stopping for gas and don't want to take all day to do so. This jerkface turned a normally 5-minute stop into a nearly 20-minute stop, for absolutely no reason. Why do I continue to be shocked by this type of completely selfish behavior? Will I ever learn??

Note: my friend did make her flight, despite the dumb girl's self-absorbed, egomaniacal gas pumping habits. But only due to my super speedy I-5 driving prowess...

FILL THE DAMN BRITA!!!

I just went to the refrigerator at work to pour myself a nice glass of Brita-filtered water. I was ridiculously thirsty. I opened the fridge...and the Brita pitcher was completely empty.

What the hell is going through your head when you pour the last of the water and then decide to put the EMPTY pitcher back in there? I'm assuming it goes something like this: "Oops, water's all gone. The courteous thing to do would be to refill it before putting it back into the fridge, but I am extremely lazy and selfish, and so I will take my delicious cold water and be happy, and too bad for whatever punk is next in line. Wah ah ah!!!"

So yes, I had to fill the pitcher and sit there while it filtered through, meanwhile dying of thirst, only to then drink my lukewarm water. Thank you very much, person who took the last of the water and did not fill it.

Also, a little fyi: an empty plastic pitcher need not be refrigerated. Just leave it on the counter, selfish lazyface. At least then I'll know I'm SOL before I open the fridge in parched anticipation.

Rude People at the Airport

Ooooooh...back to back posts! (I also just noticed that I make egregious use of the ellipsis...)

Last weekend I was flying back from Denver for a nice weekend with my college roommate, and I once again noticed that people at airports are VERY ANGRY.

First, I was walking by one of those annoying people who are trying to sell you credit cards to get free airline tickets. This woman was with Frontier, and she says as I walk by, "Do you know about our offer to get free flights?" I said, "no thank you" and smiled and kept walking. Then her smile dissolved and she got all hostile and says, "I didn't OFFER you ANYTHING, I just ASKED if you knew about it." Whoa...is that really necessary, especially for someone in the sales industry? I should have gotten her name and reported her. "Excuse me, credit card company? Do you know that your salesperson at the Denver airport is an angry, horrible person?"

Then I went to Caribou Coffee to buy Mike a bag of coffee, since it reminds him of his Minnesota upbringing. The guys behind the counter had an extremely difficult time ringing up the bag. It wasn't working, and it took three people to finally get it right. Irritating, yes, but completely not my fault. To be polite, I turned to the woman behind me and smiled and said, "I'm so sorry it is taking so long." She rolled her eyes at me and sighed loudly. Well excuuuuuuuuuuuse me for trying to be polite!!!

Anyway, I don't understand why people have to be so angry, especially when I am smiling and being polite. Let go of your anger, people. It doesn't get you what you want or get you where you're trying to go. It just makes you ugly and gives you ulcers and whatnot.

Offers for Extended Warranty

I'm no fool...I put my cell phone number on the "Do Not Call" list as soon as I found out about it. So why, I ask, do I get a phone call almost once a week offering me some extended warranty for my vehicle?

It's a recording of some woman's voice, and she tries to make it sound like it is specific to me. She says something about how time is running out to extend the warranty, and how I can activate it to protect the life of my vehicle, or some garbage like that. Interesting that time seems to be of the essence, since I've been getting the same message for MONTHS now. I wish the offer WOULD run out so they would stop calling me. They also try to get tricky and call from a different number every time. But I'm on to them. I never answer numbers that I don't recognize.

In addition to it being supremely irritating, it also sucks up my cell phone minutes. I waste at least a minute each time I have to go in and delete the voice mail. Since they call me several times a month, those jerkfaces owe me several minutes per month in cell phone minutes!

I'm wondering if ANYONE is actually foolish enough to buy into this garbage scam. I'm also wondering how they are able to call me so many times despite my number being on the "Do Not Call" list. If anyone has any advice on how to get this OBNOXIOUS scam to stop calling me, I'd love to hear it. Or let me know if it repeatedly happens to you...I'm thinking consumer class action? Anyone?